Splashing In Puddles of Sand

if you're reading this....

We never really understand things until we are out of the situation...retrospection is the key to seeing where you grew, and how things in life always tie together and end up making perfect sense in the end. Love is the best feeling in the world, it makes you smile, it gives you butterflies, it is all-consuming. Then it turns into an all-consuming sadness. It makes you cry. and cry. and cry.

I cant think of anything else. I see your face everywhere. I hear your voice. I feel your touch...

But what I am doing isn't for me. I am sad. I hurt. It hurts knowing I dont have you. But what hurts even more is knowing that I am hurting you.

I've forgotten what it feels like not to want to cry. what my throat feels like without a lump in the back of it.

I know this is all my fault. I know I could stop both of our pain in a second, in one simple phone call. But that will just postpone the hurt to a later day when I want to freak out again and when I decide I should have stuck with my original choice.

You need to realize...or at very least remember what I am saying. I'm trying NOT to hurt you. And sometimes it takes a little hurt now to avoid a lot more in the future. I do love you. And you know I do. Don't hate me.....please...I'm sorry...

posted by Oreo @ 1:11 AM