The Boy
So there was a boy involved in the last few months of my life. He lived with Rory on the Gold Coast, and I spent 6 weeks there. He told me about the job in the Snowy Mountains and put in a good word for me. So I got the job and we started working together. A bit of tumultuous history with us.But we got together in the end. We got serioulsy drunk one night and neither of us remember much of the night, never mind making out, but we were told we did. It didnt really surprise me, I knew he wanted me that night. That night we both passed out in the same bed and nothing happened, but we woke up and just got talking and then he declared that he wanted me. I took a few days to think about it, and decided that yes, I wanted him too.
We've always had a strange relationship. He intrigues me. He is really intelligent, really interesting, so we always had deep conversations on the Goldie, but our hang-over day was the first time we properly had close conversation in the Snowies. From there on everything went smoothly for a month. No problems at all. We were a full on couple, working together, living together, there was no seperation. But it was perfect. Things worked better than either of us could have imagined. Then when the honeymoon period ended there were a few bumps along the road but still pretty much good. Then he moved to Sweden, something which I always knew would happen. I helped him book his flights. From day 1 we had an expiry date on our relationship. Strange really, knowing that alright--we'll be together till August 29th and then that is it. Neither of us wanted the long-distance thing. So now he's gone and after a week of being there he got back together with his ex-girlfriend who used to live here but also lives in Sweden (he didnt follow her there though). We've been talking about it a lot lately. I was pissed off that it only took a week for him to move on. He doesn't see it my way. And it's strange because I now have The Boy: the friend, whom I still want to have in my life, and whom I will still be really close to, but I have to let go of The Boy: the boyfriend. And its hard to be mad at the boyfriend and not want to be mad at the friend. Maybe not mad. Maybe be hurt by the boyfriend and still be close to the friend.
I know I'll get over the fact that he hurt me. And that even though things were great I dont think I could ever be with him again. I have told him that. I cant trust him if he can be over me in a week, if I can be discarded that quickly. But I just thought I would write about my latest male-drama.
Things are never as good as they seem to be, and at the same time, things are never as bad as they seem to be.
posted by Oreo @ 6:41 AM
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