Splashing In Puddles of Sand

Recklessly Living: *Sometimes*

Reading over my last post I realized something...wow, I have grown up :) I can pin-point exactly when I began to grow up: January 2004. When I got back from Australia actually :) It was the beginning of the end of Rhona's reckless life. It was then that I started questioning my morals, my beliefs and my choices. I dont know if I ever answered my questions, but I have changed a lot since then. For the next two years I encountered many 'firsts' that introduced me to the proverbial real world. From sex to jobs to independent travels (no more Disney World with mom, dad and the siblings, real travelling!) to love, to...me...everything I encountered somehow left a mark on who I will be for the rest of my life. The last two years have shaped me in ways like no other years have...or possibly I just wasn't as aware of the changes in me before. These last two years have taught me to think.

Maybe it's just been college, all the studying, the analyzing, the reading into everything. When I started studying Spanish Poetry in first year our professors would read a sentence and be able to write a page of notes analyzing 5 words and I was soooooo lost :) I thought it was complete bullshit, I thought that they made it all up...I used to get so mad because I wouldn't understand how they can get a million and one meanings from 'My hands have become wrinkled.' In my still (ignorant...or at least unenlightened) stage all I thought it meant were THE AUTHOR'S HANDS WERE WRINKLED!!!! And that was IT!!!!!!!!!

By final year I was as good a bullshitter as they were (ok so bullshitting's always been a talent of mine!). I guess they did teach me to analyze things. Maybe too much.

But as for Kate's comment on my last post, the 'make mistakes' and 'annoy people' I do that way too much :) Talk to any one that knows me. haha. I get in trouble at work because I get hyper and start messing around and I distract everyone haha. That happened today :) I decided I'd make my desk a winter wonderland by cutting out snow flakes and snow men. And I hung cut up paper like icicles around my desk :)

People that know me in my day-to-day life know me as being reckless and immature and as a pure messer. Other people, like my blog readers and my closer friends know there's a serious side to me...but rarely do the two sides mix around the same people. I guess I'm afraid of opening up, and being a messer and a shit-stirrer and wreaking havoc is my way of hiding my serious side even deeper. I'm like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde...with even more mood-swings :)

Today I wanted to write about how, for the second half of the day, everyone at work seemed to be against me....but I am in too good of a mood to think about it. I am just going think about better days to come in the future!!! (*TWO MONTHS TWO MONTHS TWO MONTHS!!!* That's my new chant!)

posted by Oreo @ 7:54 PM