Burst that Bubble!
Well right after I wrote the last post I jumped up, paid for my internet (almost forgot to cuz I was on such a high) and I ran to my hostel, checked out, grabbbed my bags and jumped on the next bus out of Taupo. It means I didnt get to skydive, but it also means I didnt have to sit around on my ass all day watching the clouds...I wouldnt have been able to jump cuz of them. And I dont think they ever cleared...I love how travelling alone I can just be impulsive like that. And naturally I'm not THAT impulsive as a person, i like to take things as they come, but plan a little as well :) So it was cool to just jump up and wait until the bus ride to figure out what I was going to do!
So now I am on the South Island...today I am just relaxing and catching up on emails I have been meanign to write for a long time. Its only been 2 weeks since I left, it feels like months. It feels like so long since I've been sitting at home eating an Indian with my brother and sister, or getting up late and running into work, or sitting down in front of my computer to properly blog! It's so funny how *EVERYTHING* can change in such a short amount of time. And how happy I can be with this change. There's no doubt in my mind that I am doing *EXACTLY* what I should be doing with my life right now. I need to be out here, meeting all these people, seeing all these places, thinking all these thoughts that are in front of me. I know already there'll be no regrets to this trip.
You will only regret what you didn't do....
So I'm thinking about staying here for longer than planned originally. Have I blogged about this yet? I think I'll go to OZ, spend a while there travelling, and then come back here, pick a place I love, and work for a while. I dont know where, for how long, I dont even know why...just because I love it. Just because I want to. Just because I'm in control! The funny thing is my parents have never been over-protective with us, they've always let us be our own people, do our own thing, but all of a sudden I feel like I'm free..which doesn't make sense. I guess that even though I've done a lot of travelling, being ALONE makes me realize a lot more about the world, about people, about me. I love it so much, I cant even imagine what travelling with other people will be like after this :) Even now I find myself meeting people and after a day or two I almost feel claustrophobic hanging around with only the same people!
This trip has amazed me in so many ways. I didnt really think I'd be able to do the whole travelling solo thing...I'm so surprised that I LOVE IT.
So here's to stepping out of the comfort zone and doing something that scares the shit out of you :)
Sleepy Sunday
Well today I'm sitting around without much to do...it's a realy cloudy day and Iam waiting to sky dive but itsso cloudy i dont knwo ifitwill clear...so i dontknow if i should stay or go...hmm...maybe i will go and i can skydive in queenstown. i cant decide. times like these i wish someone wouldbe here to help me decide!!! the keyboard i am using is pretty shit so excuse the mistakes. ok maybe i will go...ahh i dont know...ok whatever..i dont feel like typing anymore haha!
CRAZINESS!!!
So I am in Taupo now and it is amazing. I love it I love it I love it!!! So a lot has happened in such a short amount of time. I did the Tongariro Crossing yesterday--a 17km hike which took 7 hours...it was so cool though, it was definitely worth the effort to do it,the scenery was amazing, we were hiking up and sliding down volcanoes and cliffs and saw some incredible stuff. yes one day i will post pictures...hmmmm...i will start i promise haha. I did the hike with a girl in my room who is so cool, she left today but is another one of those person's who you click with straight away. So we went out last night and what i can remember was really fun! haha. We were pub hopping between the 2 most happening places in taupo--both irish bars haha. in the second one they wouldnt let us in because it was too full or something, and these guys inside just told us to climb through the window so we did. Maybe you had to be there...it was a big window...actually like a hole in the wall if that makes any sense. no it doesnt, never mind. Then we went to the club caled get this: *holy cow* hehe (andy p!).
We had a good night, dont really remember much but I woke up today and i was on a couch and a guy was on the floor and another girl on another couch...haha. It turns out when the club ended we all went to get food, then a taxi back to theirs, and we had a few more drinks.hmm...i dont remember that part...well just flashes of it...haha. The weirdest thing is I dont even know where I met them, cuz they werent the people I was talking to in the club haha. Maybe I should start drinking less? haha. No it was a cool night and ohhh Kate you would be proud (and jealous) I met the HOTTEST kiwi ever...he was like 6'5 and had the body of a god! He had a girlfriend though but that didnt stop me...haha...from talking to him that is :) And one of the guys today was from Queenstown and he was *SO* nice, he cooked me breakfast, he drove me home, etc :) I could get used to that. haha.
So today I didnt get home till 12...I took a boat ride for a couple of hours and the skydiving will have to wait because if standing on earth right now makes me feel a little shaky, surely jumping out of a plane is not a good idea. So I dont know what to do tonight...I just found out it's Saturday night! hahah...I had no clue what day it is...so I might try and relax for an hour or two and then rally some people together to go out and do it all over again! haha. this time maybe I'll stay in my own bed though...maybe....So it'll be Taupo for another day and then south island! Time is running down slowly...I dont want to leave! That's another post in its own....
I FEEL GOOD
I have a t-shirt that says I FEEL GOOD on it and I love it because people (ok--guys!) ALWAYS comment on it. It's usually the same comment that I get all the time, someone will say 'so how are you feeling today? haha' or 'how good do you feel'...something simple like that, but every once in a while I get really funny comments. I admire humour. So today I thought I'd blog about some of the best comments I have gotten.
Simon in Vegas was the first one who burst in to a rendition of James Brown's song I feel good. It was very funny. Especially because he didnt just sing one line, he ran with it for a while. and for the rest of the nightafter that i think. Then today a guy I passed on the street sang it as well.
Then I always admire the guys who have the balls to say 'i bet you do' or 'i can make you feel even better' or my personal favorite 'let me be the judge of that' followed by a drunk guy trying to grope me. haha. i have issues I know :) Anyway, moral of the story...it pays to be funny with me :D
Losing Sight
I really like the title of this blog, but unfortunately it has no insightful meaning...it's literal. I'm sitting in front of the computer and everything looks blurry. The same happened to me last time I was checking my emails and i thougth it was the computer. Guess not. my eyes are too used to eyeing up guys through a pair of aviator sunnies! hehehe.
Things here are good I have picked up a LOT compared to the last time I wrote. Thanks to everyone who helped me smile when I checked my email today :)
Today I went to see this place called craters of the moon and it was crazy, like all these holes iin teh ground with steam coming up from them. It was really Jurassic Park-like. Then I went to these waterfalls with an English guy and German girl. It was cool. He's trying to convince me to stay away for months, like a year or something...he is tempting me! hahha. He keeps asking me what ihave to go home to and I stop and think NOTHING! YOU ARE RIGHT! I WILL STAY!!!!! Only time will tell. I would LOVE to just say 'FUCK IT' and come May just throw away my return ticket, fly back to new zealand, and work here for a few months! Believe me I already WANT to say that now, but the fact that andy is coming in oz makes me want to go there and then make the trip back! Maybe I DONT even want to do my masters next year...just stay out here instead of staying here, going back to study, then coming back here agian. know what i mean? my parents will *KILL* me.
Tomorrow i'm going on a hike with this other girl..not just any old hike...a NINE HOUR hike :S The tongariro crossing....uh-oh. so if you never hear from me again then you guessed it, i am somewhere around hour 2 of the 9 hour trip. haha. and the next day...drumroll please...i am sky diving! ahh!!! I'm in lake taupo which is THE place to skydive in nz, so it has to be done. I am getting a little worried. I never thought I was scared of heights until we were standing on hundred foot sand dunes before we went sand boarding down them....I guess being on the edge of an airplane about to jump out will confirm or deny if i really am afraid....
As for my bank account....lets not talk about it. I dont even know how much i have spent...i just walk to the atm a lot. and i get out a lot of money. and then i walk back to it to get out a lot more...ah well, it will be ok. today i went to the supermarket to it might be peanut butter and jam sandwiches for a long long time. maybe i will switch to nutella for a while--I'll splurge! haha.
The English guy in my hostel is going to show the me the dvd of him skydiving today so that i can get prepared for it! ohh i am getting butterflies just thinking about it! Ok that's all I have to say....
Emotional Cycles
Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.Oscar Wilde
I've been finding myself getting caught up in an emotional cycle lately. I get somewhere, and the first day there I start wondering what I'm doing, why I'm travelling, what I'm trying to find/understand/learn/get away from. And I know it's because I'm alone and have no one with me...Then I'll spend the next couple of days meeting people, having fun, and not thinking about the deep stuff. I dont like the days I start thinking...they just seem to get my down I guess. So I'm having a bit of a low moment, but considering I haven't had any really so far I can deal with it. I've been out drinking for the last 2 nights, i think I've gotten a total of about 8 hours sleep in 2 nights, and i have spent the last 8 hours on a bus so right now I'm not feeling to happy. And I found out I have to write an essay for one of my college applications and it has to be sent in over the next couple of weeks..so now I have that to do when I'm at the other side of the world and have to pay for internet acces. Wonderful.
I actually wasn't going to blog because this isn't really a reflection of the way I am feeling, just what I'm going through right now. Does that make sense? I dont want to blog about something depressing and annoying because in all honesty I havent had a care in the world over the last week, and blogging about this makes it seem bigger than it is. I'm just tired and grumpy right now. Seriously though, I was lying on the beach yesterday and for the first time in months I had nothing going through my head. It's amazing. Especially for me since I tend to analyze every situation.
I have had a couple of really cool days up in Bay of Islands. I went sand duning--absolutely cool, lay on the beach a lot, and like i already mentioned, drank a lot. haha. Lots of men on the scene as well which is always a plus :D I'm missing one of my hot buddies J cuz I had to leave him :( He's hot! jaja. dont worry, i have pics though! hehehe.
Anyway I am going to go think about things some more...or else forget about them, which ever happens first....ahh, see, this is such a depressing post! NO! I dont want that! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!!
NEW ZEALAND ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!
I Give In!
Fuck it I'm just gonna stick with this blog. Honestly because if I start a new one I probably wont write that much in it.
So my last few days have been interesting! I've been having so much fun. On my second night a group of us went out to a bar and I met this guy called Duncan. He was such a proper english boy. haha. I dont knwo what i actually included that cuz it only made me laugh cuz i wont go into the stereotypes he lived up to! hehe.
Today i am in the bay of islands...teh name says it all, it's amazing, i've only seen a little bit from land of it but i plan on going sailign in 2 days. tomorrwo i'm going up north to see the top of nz, ninety mile beach, and do some tobogganing down sand dunes! yay. I was swimming with dolphins the other day too.
This blog is kinda random...just listing things off instead of telling stories properly. My attention-span for blogging, and all internet-activities in fact has become un-existing. My love for computers is gone...there are better things I should be doing so I will have to go. I'll try to put up proper posts regularly now that i know where i am blogging to.
Cheers guys, hope you are all having fun!!!
I'M BACK!
Back blogging that is. Which raises the question if I am still writing here or not...I'm not sure. See my only problem with using this place is that people I know may want to read about my trip, but there may be certain things I've written in the past I might not necessarily want them to read. Hence the dilemma. I might just start a new one..i dont know.
So now I wonder do I write about what I've gotten up to or not? Haha!
Actually I havent got up to much, the trip went fine, and yesterday I got here after 30-something odd hours of flying, i took a bit of a walk around the place and went back to my hostel. I watched a bit of tv (Lost! I'm glad backpackers love it as much as everyone else does!) then was going to have a few drinks with some of the girls in my room but was struggling to keep my eyes open, so I took a shower and went to bed. Anyway I am going out to explore now. I still cant believe I am in NZ!
***Waiting To Be Told I'll Be Alright***
So in the run up to my leaving I sit here, in front of my computer because it means I can briefly escape the reality of packing and saying goodbye and leaving. Yes that's right, I've reached the inevitable 'turn back' stage. Things were going so well, but I knew that eventually I'd crash into the stage I'm at. It's unavoidable. I start to question what I am doing, why I am doing it, I get scared...and I'm surprised it only hit 24 hours before take off...maybe I'm stronger than I thought :) I was sure I'd be plagued by these ill-feelings for a few days. So on the one hand good for me, I didn't get too freaked out. On the other hand, now I AM freaked out... hmm.....
Anyway, it's an inevitable stage, of course at some point I'll have a couple of doubts, and considering these are the first doubts since I paid for my tickets a long 2 months ago I know what I'm about to do is what I WANT to do, but that doesn't help the quick flash of fear I'm dealing with right now...
Oh well, I think this is a little bit of fear that's getting blown out of proportion because I haven't slept enough over the last couple of nights...too much partying. So I'll have to end this little blog entry here and get some sleep!
AHHHHHH!!!!!
Well this time in 24 hours I'll be checked in at the airport! Ohh the anticipation! My last couple of days have been spent boozing...I have drank more in the past 2 days than in the last month! haha! I've been having fun, saying goodbye to people, and occasionally freaking out because I realize I've NOTHING done! I only started packing today! hahahaha. It's gone ok though...hmm...things are actually running smoothly! hehe.
Anyway I'd love to verbalize everything that I am feeling but I haven't had time to emotionalize it all yet! I'm still a little up in the air about things, like it hasn't hit me that I am going yet. I am sure sometime tomorrow I will realize it...as I sit on the plane or wander Auckland lost and aimlessly :)
I wish all of life could be as good as the travelling bits. I love the before-the-trip aniticpation. I love meeting up with old friends and being busy all the time and running around like crazy. And I love coming back and seeing them all and showing people your pics and telling a select few stories, knowing that no one will ever understand just how cool your trip was because the stories will never do it justice (people quickly lose interest when they weren't involved.)
Maybe it's just that I like having a reason to see everyone when normally we all have so many different things on. I've had so many good nights out lately it reminds me of what I love in Ireland....alcohol! hahahaha!!!!
Anyway, next time I write...I'll be in New Zealand!!! Or else freaking out before I leave tomorrow! hahaha!
I still haven't bought a journal for my trip! uh-oh. And I still havent decided if I'm using this blog or a travel one! hahaha...today's lesson:
Rhona=totally unorganised!
Let the Battle Begin!!!
In retaliation to some recent
attacks I have two responses. First of all there is an old saying that goes as this:
And secondly, let's refresh Andy's memory by checking out the dictionary:
Ohh I am beating you at your own game! In case you dont know yet--I'm bringing it, I'm bringing it so fast that it's already been brought!
THINK: INK!
I read a quote from Miguel de Cervantes today. I dont remember the exact words but it was roughly
the pen is the tongue of my mind. I really really like that...and I thought I would elaborate a bit more but my brain's needing some sleep so maybe tomorrow I'll update this post....
But I'll leave something for everyone to ponder: If the pen is the tongue of our minds, what is the ink for
YOUR pen?
Finding strength in words
Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.
--Martin Luther King, Jr.
Here's what is ahead on my staircase over the next three months:
Beaches, volcanoes, geo-thermal mud pools and glaciers in New Zealand.
Ancient cultural grounds, Scuba Diving on the Great Barrier Reef, World heritage sights, and some really good friends in Australia.
And Beaches, more scuba diving and pad thai noodles in Thailand :)
Today and Other Stuff : )
Today was my last day of work!!! Yay!
Someone came over and asked me today about my trip. She asked who I was flying to NZ with and she was *SHOCKED* that I was going alone. She said she couldn't imagine doing the flight alone...I never even got into the fact that I would actually be traveling alone, maybe just because I knew she wouldn't be able to comprehend it.
Anyway, Friday night I'm having a big session with my work-mates. It's actually a karaoke night which is a scarey thought, I refuse to get up and sing but after dozen corona's I might forget that.
It'll be an interesting night though....There's this guy Dave at work I've been getting friendly with recently and I'm starting to wonder what'll happen when we both get drunk...Because from his first day there's been weird sexual tension that we are only getting past now. So maybe we're not actually past that...hmm...We'll see.
We had a funny conversation on
Mi's blog. It's cool to see how when you envy one person, that same person envies things about you...It's a nice thought to think about.
Anyway, it's funny how Andy wrote I should write a book on men but unfortunately I think it would be VERY empty. Hmm--here's the thought for today: how much could I legitimately charge for a book with me on the cover, and only blank pages on the inside? Haha!
COINCIDENCE????
Ohhh I am freaked out!!! My post about 'life goes on...' had absolutley
NOTHING to do with the quote of the day on my blog...I wrote the post and published it and I only saw the quote NOW! Ohh I am scared, this is SOOOOOO crazy!!! Freaky coincidence! I feel like I'm being spied on now :)
Quote of the Day
In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.Robert Frost
Ok so here's another question---are there such things as coincidences????
Ohh and another one...Is
someone trying to tell me I am as poetic as Robert Frost?
How long do you wait?
If you ended up stranded on a deserted island, how long would you wait before you decided you have to give up hoping someone will come along and rescue you, and try to make a new life?
I would think after a few days of sleeping on the beach you would have to start trying to build a proper shelter, find permanent sources of water, try to find a continuous source of food, etc...you cant just sit and hope that someone eventually comes.
So why do we always sit around waiting for love to find us, waiting for someone to accompany us, waiting for something that shows no signs of appearing? Why cant we just admit to the fact that we're alone and get on with life?
After 21 years, the majority of time spent being single, I think I am used to it now. But I'm not sure. I dont know what I'm supposed to feel. If the man of my dreams came along would I take him? Straight away. If I'm single for another three years, well, I'm used to that now. But do I actually feel
alright being alone? Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be in a serious relationship, sometimes I sort of want it. But I dont sit around hoping, wishing I could find one, all the time.
I guess that's the key to it all for me. If I sat around wanting to be in love then that's a dependence on love. If I want it in the long-run but I'm not dependent on it, then that's ok isn't it...
Anyway, my question is, why we hold on to things that aren't there, and have never really been there in the first place?
Life goes on....even when we dont want it to
Tomorrow is my last day at work. How do I feel about that?
HAPPY!!! And them some other things...
Actually I thought I would feel a lot happier. I am happy. I am looking forward to Wednesday when I wake up at whatever time I want to, when I do what I want all day, and when I go to bed at whatever time I want to-knowing that I wont have work to go to the next morning. Repeat that for every day over the next 3 months!
But I'll be sad to say goodbye to the people I've spent more time with over the last few months than anyone else. People I see more than my parents, my siblings, my boyfriend, my friends, everyone. When I started working I didnt like it, but as time went on I got friendly with so many people at work that I am going to miss them all.
Maybe one thing that makes me the saddest is knowing that life DOES go on. I dont like that thought. I would like to think that everyone will be devastated that I am leaving, that the world will stop, that things will never be the same again. But that is just me being egocentric and selfish. But I suppose you want to feel like you are so important that the machine wont function with all of its parts--including you. But at the end of the day people come and go...
Life goes on. Even when we dont want it to. Kinda sad really.
ME--QUIET?!?!?!?!
I think I go through phases when it comes to blogging. Sometimes I have a lot to write about, other times I feel lost.
So this is one of those times when I dont really have much to say....I thought maybe if I started to write something would come, but it's not working
On a brighter note.....
SEVEN DAYS TILL I LEAVE!
Scarey or what?? This time in a week I'll be FREAKING out because I'll only have another 20 odd hours to go!!!
Posting My Secrets!
As I was browsing the latest entries on
postsecret I found myself wishing I had something to send in...
Maybe this week my secret would be that I wish I could have a deep-dark secret that I am strong enough to admit to the world.
Maybe it would be that I've been kidding myself about how easy the start of this trip will be for me, and that when I *REALLY* start to think about it I freak out and just let myself think about 'good thoughts.'
Maybe it would be that I'm really lonely and this trip's helping me run away from that sad truth for a little while.
Maybe it's that I drink half as much as I feel like drinking, just because I have no one to go out and drink with.
Maybe it would be that I'm afraid of always being alone in life, having no one to share my secrets with.
Maybe I wouldn't admit my secrets because, despite my 'rebel without a cause' attitude, I still crave to be accepted, and be viewed as the fun, young, care-free person in the office who goes out and has a laugh and doesn't worry about the future....when I'm really scared.
Maybe I've had too many glasses of wine before writing this post...but maybe it's all being said for a reason?
: )
I'm smiling because I just realized how much money I have for my trip :) I have a lot more than I thought I would...AND I'll get paid next Friday--so even MORE money, and I think my work'll still owe me a few weeks which I'll get in March :) Yay!
Other than that I have nothing to say.....sorry you came to my blog and this is all I had to say!
